Even though things are confusing inside me, but i know what i want... kinda. But as for my feelings, it is still taking time to settle and I hope it will, soon. .... it should.
So I now know what I want in this life so far, there's only one thing left to do: work towards it.
Oh did i mention today is the first time I ever wrote a blog? lol. I was going to join the same one as my friend did, 3 days ago. But then I decided to just google blogging and pick the top site :)
In choosing the site URL for my blog, I half wanted to keep my original nick "emeranik" but half want to change it, because I want to keep this space of mine online quiet.... but then again, I've stuck with it for so long, hence emeranik is tagged yet again on another type of account.
Currently I'm quite troubled with love life as mentioned above. I kinda told people close to me that I only want lust, not love (because really, I think love is too strong for me to use even at this age). But then again, I do want some love as well.. or something close to it.? I can't seem to decide between them...
So now, I decide to pick both. :) be greedy, aiming to have someone to care for, be cared for by that person, yet can still "fucking around" with other girls. So does that make it an "open relationship" that I am looking for? hmmm.. english tagged so many kind of things, I get confused by them a lot. ie: like, love, lust, crush... who to decide/set their magnitude, how to measure it :(
Wow, that's a lot of things I've written for today, especially when I thought "wtf would I be writing on a blog?"
Goodnight all.
P.S: no auto-correct for "i" to "I" on this site sucks hardcore.
U only want lust???? Really????
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